Kale, My Ex, and Other Things to Toss in a Blender by Lisa Greenwald

Author:Lisa Greenwald
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Random House Children's Books
Published: 2017-05-30T04:00:00+00:00

JUSTINE

“You’re crushing it,” Emmett said as I walked into the bank a few days later.

“Huh?” I laughed. “What exactly am I crushing?”

“You’re crushing whatever job you do. You’re always here depositing money.” He looked at me sideways. “Are you sure what you’re doing is legal?”

“Ummmm.” I glanced around. “Is this being recorded? Are you undercover?”

Then he really cracked up. There was no better feeling in the entire world than making another person laugh. It was the ultimate sense of accomplishment, of purpose, of success. It was like this small thing that didn’t even really take that much effort made the world so much happier.

“Who are you?” he asked. “You’re not like anyone else I’ve ever met. Are you some kind of immigrant from another galaxy?”

I shifted my messenger bag to the other shoulder. “You figured me out, Emmett.” I started walking toward the tellers. “But I could say the same thing about you,” I called back to him.

After I deposited the snow cone money, I decided to open another account, under my name, for all the smoothie money. It was too much to keep in a shoe box, and that wasn’t really very safe.

We were crushing it. We needed to keep it separate and keep track of how much we were making.

On my way out of the bank, Emmett stopped me. “Hey, can I show you something?”

“I know about ATMs. They’ve been around awhile….”

“Are you ever not sarcastic?” he asked me.

“I’m pretty much sarcastic all the time,” I admitted. “Do you still want to show me something?”

He looked around and then grabbed my hand.

We were holding hands. Emmett and me. In the bank.

We walked silently down this long hallway, and my stomach tightened. It suddenly seemed like we were in a horror film, and I wondered if he was going to kill me or something. But there were security cameras everywhere, I reasoned, and his dad was like a senior vice-president….And why would he kill me? That didn’t even make sense. Unless he was some kind of psycho or something, but he really seemed normal and, like, well adjusted.

He took a key chain out of his pocket and unlocked the door.

“Oh my God,” I said. “I used to come here with my mom all the time, as a little kid. I liked it because I got to sit in those comfy chairs, and I always got lollipops. I think my mom still keeps important stuff in a safe-deposit box.”

He nodded. “Cool.”

Okay, so he didn’t get as excited about my safe-deposit box story as I’d hoped. “So what do you want to show me?”

“Just this.” He smiled and made sure the door was locked.

I gulped and looked around. There were cameras in here, too….

“Um.” This was definitely the stuff of horror films. I could see the headlines: Local girl murdered in bank safe-deposit box room. Body undiscovered for two weeks….Actually, Mia would look for me pretty much right away, so it wouldn’t be two weeks. “Cool.”

“So when I told my friends

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